Ever since the birth of my daughter every outing with her has been a different experience for me . I see people looking with questioning eyes, sometimes judging the way I hold my baby the way I treat her talk to her and most importantly the things I allow her to do whilst in public. I’m very conservative with most things in life especially my opinions and expressing them to people. So its no surprise when I come across people with nasty comments all I’m left with is frustration and the entire scenario being played in my head on repeat with me giving a clever comeback. It’s annoying and yet I can’t seem to fight my way out of this cycle although I’ve gotten more courage (not enough still) to do something about my frustration. I’m still working on how to keep calm and be able to get my point across. Today Jana wanted to close the museum door (because she has a thing about closing doors) and the guard asked us to keep our kid under control. Now I know he was right, but it just made my blood boil. I’m sure there were plenty of other ways to get his message across. He could probably see me and her dad were trying to distract her from the door so she wouldn’t throw a tantrum for asking her to get away from the door and safely diuretics what was happening. Instead he felt like being an assessment which resulted in me not wanting to step inside the museum. Gah.
This post is actually not about the people that point and judge in fact it’s for all the kindness I have received just for the mere fact that I have a tiny person with me. It’s amazing how people’s faces light up when they see her. How they want to interact with her, touch her, hold her finger, kiss her just because she’s who she is. Even when she’s upset and crying with no explanation people stop and smile and try to ‘help’ by giving their view on the matter. It makes my heart happy that they took the time out to talk and not just stand and stare wondering why I haven’t got my child under control. I’m perhaps a little more nervous then I ever was (was I ever?) In my life, but maybe it all comes as part of the territory? It doesn’t help when people start staring. Thank you for all the kindness you have showed me and image of a beautiful world you help create in my child’s eyes.